Ivy Tied Up |

Well yesterday I turned the big 26.. Yea Yea Yeah i’m not old I get it already.. But i’m now officially closer to 30 than to 20.. Anyhow..

Nothing great or grand about it.. My sister called to tell me happy birthday, my dad called, and my friend called. My friend Tracy sent me the f unniest card.. She is the only one other than my grandmother who sent me a card..

The card said..

Don’t worry, Girl-
you’re not old if you can still blow out all your birthday candles…..

then you open it up and it sa ys..

with out leaving boob prints in the cake..

I thought that was REALLY funny.. And got a good laugh out of it..
My day was really good until the afternoon.. I shouldnt have let anything bother me really.. But this did.. My mom didnt bother calling or showing up over here.. And like an idiot I expected her to. I should have known better really…
This isnt the first time she has done this to me.. See.. What aggrevates me or hurts my feelings is the fact that my sisters birthday.. is 6 days before mine.. 6 days! Thats it.. If she remembers hers.. She can damn sure remember mine..

Well she called my sister that morning. Told her happy birthday. She went by after work.. Brought her a cake. And everything… I told them I didnt want a cake since i’m doing weight watchers I didnt want to tempt myself really and i’m not big on sweets.. Well I still expected her to acknowledge I was alive and that this was the day i was born on.. I expected her to call. I expected her to come by.. I was stupid for expecting anything because I just set myself up to be hurt. As usual when it comes to her and my birthday.. She goes all otu for my sister and then I end up with NOTHING.. Not even a happy birthday! Whats sad.. Is I did speak to her yesterday.. 2 times.. She never said happy birthday.. I saw her the night before as I went by the house and she never said happy birthday. She never said shit. And she didnt come by.. Now maybe i’m being stupid.. But i’m so tired of being dealt the low hand when it comes to her.. I dont expect money to be spent on me.. But I damn sure expect to be acknowledged..

A few years ago.. my mom called the radio station for my sisters bday. Called my sister at 7;30am so that she was the first one to tell her happy birthday. me.. I got jack squat.. Just like this year.. And you know what.. THAT HURTS! Its like she is punishing me.. I know she can’t forget.. My sisters bday is 6 days before mine! How the hell do you forget.. Not to mention my moms is 3 days after mine! A couple of years ago she did remember.. She did get me a cake and came by.. it was the one out of 10 she has actually acknowledged.. 1 out of 10!!!!!!!!

I don’t like to compare gifts, or antics, or what have you but this really just takes the cake for lack of better words.. I just dont see how she could forget my birthday.. You know as well as I do that she didnt forget.. She did NOT forget.. She KNEW my sister watched my kids on monday night so that my friend could take me to eat (oh yeah we had a blast!) for my birthday.. She knew my birthday was the next day.. She didnt forget.. Its like she does it on purpose. She is punishing me for something. And she knows it hurts. The question is WHY? What the hell did I do?

The bigger question is why did I let it r uin my entire day when I knew it was going to happen.. Why did I set myself up for such a huge disappointment? It wouldnt have been so bad but she raved and raved to everyone about how she bought my sister a cake on her birthday and went by there so she wo uld feel special on her birthday. She told all her family that she bought my sister a winnie the pooh cake and went on and on and on. And i’m here and I didn’ even get a happy birthday. Its not about cake, or gifts, or material things.. Its about that simple acknowledgement.. And well.. shit happens..

The rest of the day was pretty good.. Monday night my friend took me to eat at a lil mexican restraunt. We had a blast.. It was so good to get out with out the kids. It was a little weird though..LOL no one needing to go potty, yelling, screaming, ect. It was really nice..

OH! And i’m half way through my first goal! I lost 5 lbs! WOO HOO!