Ivy Tied Up |

My parents that is.. Me I’ve done well to stay out of it but it still affects me as its hurting my sister more than it is me. Apparently my dad is on one of his self destruct paths. He did this a few years ago to where his life was so out of his control he spiraled farther and further until he had lost everything he had. Not literally but figuratively (SPL). But the question is..

What is the driving force behind his spiral? What causes his life to spin so out of control that he no longer has any control left at all?

The only answer I can come up with is that he is the cause.. He seems to go through these things and he gets out of control. And then everything keeps going from there. It starts at work.. The stresses of his job then it gets worse and he cant stop the feeling he gets. Then he spends money he doesn’t have. He finances things until he is back in debt. Which he recently did by buying a boat, a new camera, a new case for said camera, a new computer (I think he paid cash though), a new lawn mower, etc. He managed to get out of debt and build his credit back up a few years ago.. And now he is right back where he was. Credit cards maxed out, etc. And he cant afford it all and the stress is getting to him. So that plus the stress of his job he starts taking it out on my mom.. And things get worse. The spiral starts and then it continues until he flips out.

Which he did the other day and my sister was the one to feel his wrath. He flipped out over her not calling him back. She was cleaning house that day and he had called like 20 times. She forgot to call him back later in the day and he flipped out. The next day he told her to never call him again, to go to his house and get all her shit out of his house or he’d go throw it in her front yard. See what i mean? That is WAY Over the top.. Extreme.. You don’t talk to your kids like that..

See he went off on her.. because he is trying to fight with my mom. I say trying because she is refusing to fight back. He wants to fight. He wants her to fight back and argue and everything else. he cant stand it when he is like this and no one will fight back.. Well he thinks my sister is on her(my moms) side. He thinks she is taking my moms side and that she thinks about him like my mom does.. And she (my sister) didn’t even say anything or do anything for that matter. Now Jennifer is not often innocent. Nor is my mom.. They are RARELY innocent.

They love to gang up on me and my dad. So I know how he is/was feeling. I know the frame of mine he was thinking with. BUT That gave him NO RIGHT to do what he did or say what he did.. They have often excluded him and made him the butt of their jokes. They have honestly pushed him past the breaking point. His reaction is really all he has left. And I understand this.. But I also know that gives him NO RIGHT to do her like he did.. She didn’t do anything. He did this to her 6 years ago.. He threw her out of his house because she didn’t agree with him. And she had no where else to go with her daughter and they came and lived with me.. Long story short.. He eventually apologized which he always does to her.. And things were fine..Then a few years later he did it again. Then again. And now again. And this time she is hurt way too badly to take an apology for it..

Now see.. I think my dad has lost it I really do. He is on this vendetta to make my moms life a living hell. Like she did to him for so many years. When I was growing up it was hell. You never knew how her mood would be. If she’d like you that day or not. She made everyone around her miserable for 20 years. NOW he thinks he is going to do it to her. He has moved out 4 times. This time he refuses to leave. Its like he moved in just to piss her off and see how miserable he can make her. He flat out told me he will NOT leave this time that he has realized that’s his damn house and its in his control now.

Now whats bad. My mom she wont leave. She has put her heart into that house. And fixed it to where its hers. She cant see leaving it. She cant really afford the house on her own either though. I think they’d be better off divorced. I’m tired of the bickering I’m tired of all the crap that comes with being their child. I love both of my parents but its coming. Even though my mom can be a huge bitch (yes I said it and I mean it..She really can be) Ive got a better relationship with her than I’ve ever had.

My mom has always been a monster. Literally. But a few years ago. She had her thyroid out and things REALLY CHANGED. Her moods were not as bad. Before they were severely extreme and now my dad thinks he will pay her back for all her years of cruelty. And I think its stupid. Revenge is stupid. You don’t move in with someone JUST to make them miserable. It makes the whole damn family miserable.

I see where this is headed and its scary. See they were arrested over a year ago. For domestic bullshit. My mom thought she’d show my dad by calling the cops because he threw a soda and it went everywhere and he refused to clean it up. (see this has been going on forever) They got out. It hurt both of them because they both hold respectable jobs and word spread really easily considering it was in the paper on Sunday! My dad works a state job.. It really hurt him.. They both swore they’d never go back that way again and things got better for a while. And yet here we are again.. Its coming.. Its coming!!!!!!!!!!He doesn’t see it like I do..

He is on the verge of losing everything he has again. His respect, self respect (I think that already gone), his friends, his family, his possessions(because they will be repossessed because he cant afford them), his house, his life, etc. And with out your family and friends what do you have???????????? You have nothing.. NOTHING..

And when it comes down to it.. I’m going to be asked to take sides.ANd I’m going to refuse and things will get rather tense.. You see my dad wont treat me like he does my mom and sister. He will just bitch non stop and try to get me to take his side.. And my mom will do the same.. And if she thinks I’m on my dads side.. I’ll get the silent treatment from her.. And my dad.. if he thinks I’m on my moms side.. He will call non stop and try to plead his case all the while saying that he isn’t trying to bad mouth my mom..

I just don’t see anything good coming out of this. What scares me and you can all say I’m being silly here.. But I’m not.. I’ve had this same dream forever.. Since I was a teen. My parents end up being the death of each other. They are fighting and then boom its over.. I’ve told them this. They both think I’m silly but I’m not..

My mom showed up over here at 10 am today. I knew something was up. She doesn’t EVER come over my house and she damn sure doesn’t come over that early because she assumes we are asleep. We weren’t asleep though. We were outside cleaning the yard and washing my car.. She was surprised.. i asked what was up she said nothing. She just kinda hung around not saying anything.

Then I talked to my sister tonight. She said that my mom told her she couldn’t wash her clothes at home that my dad told her she had to pay rent to wash her clothes.. IN HER OWN HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is getting absurd.. Beyond crazy! I don’t need this shit with me being pregnant.. Its getting old.. And this time I can honestly say.. My sister and my mom didn’t do anything. BUT i guess years of what one could call mental torture has caught up with him.. And I can honestly say it has been years of mental torture.. Mental hell.. Because I lived it with him. I know. But That doesn’t give him any right to act like they did.. This is one instance where 2 wrongs certainly do not make a right..