Ivy Tied Up |

He doesnt see how I watch him
watch him sleep, eat, think.
He doesnt know how my mind
has memorized everything

I’ve been watching him for years now. I know his every feature. His every line, wrinkle, curl. I watch him all the time. As if he was something rare. A jewel. Something I can see but never touch. It pains me to watch him. To watch him so intently. It hurts deep down inside because I can never get in. I can watch him all I want but he’ll never be what I need. He’ll never be what I want him to be. I long for something I can never have. Yet I can’t put my finger on just what that is. I just know it will never be there. I can’t change him and I cant mold to what he needs me to be. Cant equals wont. I’m not that person.